5 gum is a fraud

So they have recently been handing out free gum in the SUB (student union building). The brand name is called "5" supposedly because it allows you to experience all five senses. Maybe they didn't think this through properly. Let's go through the five senses and see what the gum contributes to your experience.

1) Taste: a pretty obvious one as the gum tastes fruity. check.

2) Sight: the box looks cool and the wrappers are shiny and colorful. check.

3) Smell: the gum smells like what it's going to taste like. check.

4) Touch: the box is smooth with little ridges and indentations. The gum feels sticky. check.

5) Hearing: here is the problem. The gum itself provides no obvious sounds. You chewing the gum is not sound produced by the gum but rather sound produced by yourself. Until they install some little nano radio into gum, this sense is not met.

4 out of 5 is pretty good and they are giving it out for free, but I hold them to a higher standard. This is not like Red Bull claiming "it gives you wings". The stimulation of all five senses is a reasonable request and it is disappointing that it is not met.